A group of outraged citizens and myself have managed to capture...er...corner the infamous necromancer Johannes Cabal and put him to some questions.
"Corner" might be overstating things. We stopped him on the street, ready to take him into custody, but...er...he was quite persuasive and most adamant that he did NOT WISH to be taken into custody. His arguments were most vigorous to the contrary and, in the end, our group of inquisitors found ourselves forced to relent.
Interview proceeds as follows:
INQUISITOR: Mr. Cabal, is it or is it not true that you have had congress with the Devil, Lucifer, or his minions, and, under pain of torture, what is the nature of your infernal covenant?
JOHANNES CABAL: Torture? My dear sir, you need only ask. Politely. I have had dealings with Satan -- I don't like to call him "Lucifer," he gets such airs and graces at the best of times, but he becomes positively maudlin if you remind him he was once an angel... Where was I? Oh, yes. I have had dealings with Satan and his happy little band of helpers on several occasions. He was rarely helpful, frequently evasive, and predictably duplicitous. If the point of this questioning is to somehow suggest that I worship Satan, you do not understand my relationship with the entity in question at all. All our dealings have been in the nature of business arrangements, albeit dealing with commodities that you are unlikely to find in the pages of the "Financial Times." Possibly in the "Wall Street Journal."
INQUISITOR: Have you no shame, sir?
JOHANNES CABAL: Of course, sir. Three fluid ounces in a small bottle in cabinet five in my laboratory. Why? Do you find yourself short?
INQUISITOR: How do you answer the charge that you have, in the course of your infernal pursuits, committed grave robbery in order to procure decaying female (and male) bodies in order to pursue your deviant sexual desires?
JOHANNES CABAL: I'm afraid you have mistaken me for somebody else. Your father, perhaps. There must be some be some explanation for you, and that would seem to fit the visible evidence. Yes, I have had cause to exhume fresh bodies for my researches, but it is a finicky and uncertain business, fraught with difficulties, many of which carry truncheons and loud whistles. It occurs to me that I could save myself a great deal of unpleasantness by simply making my own corpses, perfectly fresh and ready for experimentation. The one sticking point is finding the necessary raw materials. They would have to be startlingly gullible and of no use whatsoever to humanity so that their loss is of no great concern. Hmmm. Tell me, sir, just as a matter of interest and a propos to nothing, would you happen to know what a Swann-Morton No.22 is? No? Here, let me educate you.
Things became a little confused and cloudy, after that, and I chose to allow my other inquisitors put questions to him while I took a small break to search for a laundry. My pants had become soiled in the course of our questioning - muddy streets! Dashed inconvenient, I say. These, of course, were solely my questions for the recalcitrant (and quite unruly) Mr. Cabal. My other co-inquisitors share their questions on their own respective electronic journals.
For more information regarding Mr. Cabal, you can visit his biographer's electronic address: Jonathan L. Howard, esquire.
To purchase various papers and periodicals depicting the nefarious infernal dealings of Mr. Cabal, visit Amazon by clicking HERE.
(This is just one in a series of interlinked posts regarding Johannes Cabal. Should you wish to start from the beginning of the circle, the wyrm's head itself, click on the preceding graphic.)
15 hours ago